An Alarming Tract!
From Atlantic Roleplay Wiki
Title: An Alarming Tract!
Author: Garrett Granth
--The first half of this tract is a rollicking illustration of fisherman at work. They have been badly rendered, with greedy sneers, scale-specked beards, and glutted bellies hardly concealed by filthy doublets and open vests that reveal far too much chest hair. They are involved in a roaring orgy of fishing - plucking fish out of churning water, hacking fish to bloody bits with scales covering the knives. Anyone viewing this would be inclined to believe just about anything about the illustrated subjects--
HEAR YE HEAR YE those of ye who want fair justice and balance in nature! Thee order of thee...
--someone has ripped apart the tract here, all you can see is an imprint that reads "Bloody elves, I'll write it myself."--
Attention dear readers who value the riches of the sea! These days our beloved seas and oceans are a rich and thriving source of good food - cheap protein that requires little input. It is a goodly industry that requires little in start-up costs; nothing more than a fishing pole.
For years the fisherman existed to feed the masses, but now a new drive to loot the seas has a different drive: To profit! Fishmongers wait for ships laden with the bounty of the sea, fishermen throw "trash" fish onto docks and shoresides, and the litter builds and the oceans are deprived! Why in a generation we elves calculate (editors note: Terrible at math, they are. Can't imagine how they do all that woodcarving) that there will be less than zero fish left in all the waters of Sosaria! Therefore, we would like to administer a simple and profound solution - fishing for humans.
Imagine the benefit for elven and gargoylian kinds! Why, just as the tuna lives longer than the human, and just as the human lives longer than the makerel, there is no mathematical reason for not hunting humans! Why, clearly humans consider themselves animals, as referenced in the philosophical ponderings of Tracker Walker, in New Haven - he maintains that there is not, in fact, a theory of evolution that would raise humans up from animalistic roots - there is merely a list of animals he has allowed to live.
Humans live, therefore they are clearly on that list, and therefore clearly animals, and therefore should be hunted. Such a conclusion is only logical.
Certain human demagouges may protest at their inclusion in such illustrious company, but they can provide no moral nor ethical quandary to the human situation - namely, to be hunted by those who are greater than they. The ophidians, whom humans, elves, and gargoyle have all aided in their war with the Bane Chosen - they have a similar philosophy towards humans, and humans in ages past have turned against the ophidians en masse, for the most elaborate of coordinated slaughters - much as human fisherman crowding our shores and clamoring for the fishmongers attention, do in these maritime times. (Editors note: Maritime times? These elves are truly daft!
That's it, I'm taking back the commission. This book is rubbish! Rubbish!)
--The rest of the book has been trashed, scratched through, and defaced, though you catch many references to "shapeshifting human mages," "gluttinous bastards!" and "half-dwarven women."--
A Britannian Publishing Company patented alarmist tract.
Guaranteed to inflame the passions!